What was I thinking???????

I have been reading a lot of different blogs lately written by parents who have a child with Down syndrome. They are all so great and very encouraging to me. One comman thing I have noticed is that all of us parents have at one time or another received rude, hurtful, insensative, and ignorant comments in regards to our child having Down syndrome. I am not going to share any of the comments I have received by strangers, but I am going to be honest and tell you about the insane thoughts I had right after Rylie's birth. Some of these- I just thought and some of them I actually said out loud. Please forgive me as I knew nothing about Ds . This is why I forgive other people who have made insensative comments to me. Anyway-here goes...............

1. After the pediatrician told me that they thought Rylie had Down syndrome I immediatley thought I was going to have a child in a wheelchair. I really wasn't sure what Down syndrome was!

2. I wasn't sure if I should still give her the name Rylie (which I had picked out even before I knew I was pregnant)

3. I asked the pediatrician if the baby had Down syndrome because of the Benedryl I took one time during pregnancy(which my obgyn recommended for me). I had to be convinced by the doctor several times that it wasn't my fault. I still get bothered by the thought that people might think that Down syndrome is caused by something the parents did.

4. I actually said to a nurse "she is so beautiful-will she stay beautiful? -Duh-that was dumb. Rylie is gorgeous. I honestly do think children and adults with Down syndrome are beautiful. But of course I think Rylie is the most beautiful.

5. When people brought me gifts up to the hospital ie...adorable outfits...I thought- will she be able to wear regular clothes? I am laughing right now remembering this one.

6. I thought Karlie (Rylie's big sister) was going to be mad at me and she was only 4 yrs old at the time. I am still laughing!

7. I went down the list of characteristics and convinced myself that Rylie didn't have any of them and that her bloodwork was going to come back negative for Down syndrome and then all the doctors would have to apologize to me.



There are more -but, these are some I'm choosing to share. Some of them make me laugh and some of them make me think- what on earth was wrong with me? So like I said before...this is why I'm so forgiving when strangers make ignorant comments to me. I am glad that I am now very educated when it comes to Down syndrome-but I am still learning.